Premessa 1. Sono nel bel mezzo di un trasloco. Premessa 2. Sono relativamente soddisfatto del servizio in fibra ottica offerto da Fastweb.
Così, si diceva, sto traslocando. Ho visto cose, in queste settimane, che voi umani non potreste mai immaginare. Cucine da combattimento in fiamme al largo dei bastioni di Lissone. Ho visto faretti B balenare nel buio, vicino alle porte di IKEA Carugate. E tutti quei momenti andranno perduti nel tempo.
No. Un attimo. Non tutti. I momenti spesi al telefono con i signori Fastweb resteranno nella nostra memoria. Come lacrime indelebili. Tanti momenti. Infiniti momenti. Il fatto è che traslocando trasferirò il mio abbonamento da Grotta 1 a Grotta 2. Da fibra a fibra. Da borchia A a borchia B. Inoltre, dovrò spostare borchia B all'ingresso di Grotta 2. Visto che l'intera parete dove borchia B si trova verrà ricoperta da un armadio a muro di diecimila tonnellate. Armadio che una volta messo lì ci dovrà restare. Per alcuni secoli.
Così chiamo i signori di Fastweb per chiedere se posso coprire definitivamente borchia B. Con l'armadio secolare. La cosa divertente è la varietà di risposte ricevute. In base al fatto che sia Maria, Sergio, Anna, Marina, Sandro a rispondere. Proverò ad elencarne alcune (di risposte).
Domanda. Salve. Devo traslocare. Problemi se copro borchia B con un armadio, forever?
Risposta. Nessun problema. Tanto la fibra arriva dalle scale.
Domanda. Devo traslocare. Problemi se copro borchia B con un armadio, forever?
Risposta. Dipende. Probabilmente no, ma deve aspettare la valutazione del tecnico.
Domanda. Trasloco. Problemi se copro borchia B con un armadio, fino alla notte dei tempi?
Risposta. Si. Deve lasciare la parete libera. Non può coprire con l'armadio!!!
Domanda. Trasloco. Problemi se copro borchia B con un armadio?
Risposta. Figuriamoci. Può installare le nuove borchie dove vuole.
Domanda. Trasloco. Problemi se copro borchia B con un armadio, per sempre?
Risposta. Se il condominio è esposto a sud deve installare la borchia a nord. Se è a ovest la installerà a est.
Domanda. Trasloco. Problemi se copro borchia B con un armadio?
Risposta. Tutto dipende se bloccherà o meno il flusso di energia previsto dal feng-shui. Se lo bloccherà, gravi malanni si abbatteranno su di lei e sulla sua psiche.
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