Entro. Aereo. Prendo posto. Sistemo il bagaglio. Cintura. Cellulare. Pochi minuti prima della partenza.
GOOD morning, ladies and gentlemen. We are delighted to welcome you aboard Veritas Airways, the airline that tells it like it is. Please ensure that your seat belt is fastened, your seat back is upright and your tray-table is stowed.
Tavolini chiusi. Cinture allacciate. Cellulari spenti. Sicurezza. Credo. Sicurezza. Interferenza con gli strumenti di volo. Immagino. E poi le cinture. E i salvagenti gonfiabili. In caso di ammaraggio. Emergenze e sicurezza, già. Leggo. Leggo l'articolo dell'Economist [Welcome Aboard, link, a pagamento] e alcuni dubbi si chiariscono. "Veritas Airways". Si immagina di volare con una compagnia dove tutti i segreti del volo sono svelati. E anche il dubbio sulle interferenze dei cellulari è finalmente chiarito.Your life-jacket can be found under your seat, but please do not remove it now. In fact, do not bother to look for it at all. In the event of a landing on water, an unprecedented miracle will have occurred, because in the history of aviation the number of wide-bodied aircraft that have made successful landings on water is zero.
Please switch off all mobile phones, since they can interfere with the aircraft's navigation systems. At least, that's what you've always been told. The real reason to switch them off is because they interfere with mobile networks on the ground, but somehow that doesn't sound quite so good. [...] We will have to come clean about this next year, when we introduce in-flight calling across the Veritas fleet. At that point the prospect of taking a cut of the sky-high calling charges will miraculously cause our safety concerns about mobile phones to evaporate.
Il volo è terminato. L'articolo anche. Si arriva finalmente a destinazione.
After take-off, the most dangerous part of the flight, the captain will say a few words that will either be so quiet that you will not be able to hear them, or so loud that they could wake the dead. So please sit back, relax and enjoy the flight. We appreciate that you have a choice of airlines and we thank you for choosing Veritas, a member of an incomprehensible alliance of obscure foreign outfits, most of which you have never heard of.
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